11:14 p.m. I decided to get a couple beers before embarking on my Twilight Journey. From 10:45p rill now the line has more than doubled in size with Tweens, scrary middle aged guys here without kids and an umbrella, a van who I am sure will be recruiting kids to help find his dog or check out the awesome “figures” he has in his basement. They are selling RedBull in line. Twilight fans are decadent and depraved.
11:28 p.m. — I just heard one group of Tweens say to another “Oh, you’re Team Jacob? We’re no longer talking to you. I just spoke to the people with the Redbull, turns out it is free and they are part of the Redbull “Wings Team” that go around to different events handing out free Redbull. Long-story short, I got free Redbull. Just noticed homemade wife beaters that say Eclipise 2010”… it just got real.
11:38 p.m. - I’m in the theater. The smell of Redbull and angst are almost overpowering. I think I would feel more comfortable if I was planning on abducting a bakers dozen of these girls/boys, but I’m not and which is somehow intrinsicly more creepy.
11:53 p.m. - There are camera flashes going on all around me. Tomorrow, my greatest fear of not being tagged in a massive amount of Facebook photos will be realized. My friend just showed me a “Texts from Last Night” that read: You should give me head with plastic fangs in.” I just want to shout “BAD IDEA!” at the top of my lungs, but I know such acts are futile and will only draw attention to my 28-year-old Twilight going self. I remain stoic and silent. I remain.
11:58 p.m. - The women (yes, I used that word to correctly identify their ages) behind me are engaged in a spirited debate about Twilight lore and what forces who controls and who sacrifices themselves and what that really means. I think that are old and sad… then I remember every conversation I have had in late July/early August in San Diego about whether “Greedo shooting first” ultimatly changed that Star Wars movies and who was a better pilot Wedge or Luke, and I forgive them and wallow in my own pool of shame. Excelsior!
12:03 a.m. - Trailers are starting. Must run silent. If you need me, remember, two pings. See ya on the other side.
